This proposal was a gem. We wrote it up in about half an hour, mostly in an attempt to troll our professor with bloated wording that literally held no meaning. The requirements were to describe our proposed topic in the first paragraph, the sources we had found so far in the second, and the type of presentation in the third. She held a class in which she went through each proposal to ensure all the teams had an appropriate topic. As she went down the list of teams in class, she was cutting down proposal left and right. Ryan, our partner Pete, and I were shitting bricks, because we knew that our proposal was held together with nothing more than a few whimsical sentences about nothing, and good intentions. But when she got to ours, she ATE IT UP WITH A SPOON. She loved every second of it. We were blown away. Ryan and I were actually speechless, and we had to go directly to Dewick to discuss how we had beaten the system. It was magnificent. Also, I'll try to highlight the more ridiculous aspects of the article. I present to you, our Astron Song Proposal:
Stellar Evolution: a Tribute to the Life of a Star
The project that we plan to undertake is the life sequence of stars. This includes the possibilities of how a star transforms from its creation until its death. Its life on the main sequence is obviously an important part of the star’s life, so it will be included in our project. How a star becomes a giant and then a dwarf will also be covered. One of the more interesting aspects of this topic, my esteemed colleagues and I have found, is how a star dies. There are many different possibilities for how a star can die, whether it be through a supernova, black hole, or neutron star. We will also go over the various attributes of each phase in a stars life, and how the mass of a star plays an important role in how a star lives and dies.
For a subject as important as stellar evolution we decided to go to the guru of all reference sources: the library catalogue. Upon reaching our master, we found a plethora of available articles that pertained to the subject at hand. We found several websites that are particularly applicable, reliable and just great! One source, an article by Chiosi discusses the H-R diagram in great detail. In the H-R diagram, stars are graphed based on their luminosity and temperature, resulting in a main sequence of stars. It might be helpful to reinforce this concept of a main sequence to have people imagine the main road in their hometown. Most important stores are located on this main street and a store might even be considered to be an outlier should it not be located on this street, like a star that doesn’t fall on the main sequence. (Ok, I have to mention this one. Our professor was SO ADAMANT about the fact that the Main Sequence was like a main road in a town, as if we were incapable of understanding that "a lot of stars are there." She went over this idea on about 6 separate occasions. It was ridiculous. So we ran with it.) Another scintillating article from Jørgen Christensen-Dalsgaard discusses stellar evolution. More specifically it discusses how energy is radiated from the stars and how the star changes from its infancy into its old age. A third article was found, written by James Kaler, concentrates on how a star is formed, how the star evolves, and finally, the different ways a star can die. We were also able to locate a great number of sources in Scientific American and Popular Science.
Many motivated and intelligent students have attempted to put forth an interesting presentation of their topic but have gone down in flames. We are confident despite the great failings of other students in the past that we can put on an original presentation that will be discussed for years to come. For our presentation we plan to compose a lyrical ballad that will capture the beautiful spirit of our fascinating topic. This is only small potatoes compared to the thrilling and captivating PowerPoint slide that will encompass some of the rawest data pertaining to stellar evolution. Both Chris and Ryan will write the lyrics and chords for the song. The presentation involving a greater description of the life sequence of stars will be created by Chris, Ryan, and Pete, and will be delivered by all three as well. This is a very tall order for any mortal, but should we be able to accomplish this almost impossible feat, we will go down in history as the greatest astronomy presenters known to mankind.
We really lost control at the end there. Seriously: we got an A FRIGGN PLUS on this. If you want to hear the actual Astron Song, it's on youtube:
Part 1:
Part 2:
Yeah, over 11 minutes of pure brilliance. Including a ~2 minute guitar jam session and a harmonica solo. AND guest appearance singers. SO MUCH AWESOMENESS.
