Monday, November 19, 2012

Spells over the Internet

I wanted to put a bunch of my shorter attempts at conversing with scammers.  Here are a few of the emails of the scammers that have caught on early in the game.




Well this is a new premise.  If this noble scholar can truly cast spells over the internet, I'm going to him for ALL my problems from now on.


September 25, 2012
Subject: GREAT OGANGAN SPIRITUAL TEMPLE

From: Dr. Ogangan

To: --

GREAT OGANGAN SPIRITUAL TEMPLE

This a spell temple from Africa were all kinds spiritual problems are solve all around the world.A day to cast this spell and the other day of it you will see the result of the spell, We don't charge any money for this powerful spell,we do this to bring everlasting hapinness to mankind. We cast all sort of spells such as, magical money spell or good luck, automatic promotion in office, making marriage partner or lover love you, spells to bring close one in jail or lost back home,healing spell etc.

You can contact us via email on [email]

His Highness
Dr OGANGAN



September 25, 2012
Subject: Re: GREAT OGANGAN SPIRITUAL TEMPLE

From: Will Smith

To: Dr. Ogangan

Hello Dr. Highness Ogangan,

I am a deeply religious man with a terrible affliction.  Most hospitals don't know how to help me, so I have turned to non-conventional powers instead.  Up until now, nothing has worked, but I think the Universe is sending me a sign with your message.  I am very interested to try your powerful spells.  The "magical money" and "automatic promotion in office" spells sounds intriguing, but I'm especially interested in your healing powers.  Please tell me what I have to do so that I may feel the healing embrace of your magic spells.

I am in your debt,
-William Smith



September 25, 2012
Subject: Re: GREAT OGANGAN SPIRITUAL TEMPLE

From: Dr. Ogangan
To: Will Smith


My Child,


        You are welcome to my shrine where all kinds of problem are solved. This spell is a very powerful spell it is going to take A day to cast this spell and the other day of it you will see the result of my spell, I don't charge for my spell you are only required to provide me  the information need to cast the spell then after the spell have worked according to plan you can voluntary contribute to my orphanage home is not a  task that you must pay but for the information which is going to be used for the consultation of  this spell must be brought by you. My spell last for a permanent nature and this spell we are talking about must work for what is behind it is powerful. During the casting of this spell I will tell you what to do and after casting the spell you will also be told what to do cause all this I will consult from my gods. You are to get back to me with the following details below.
YOUR NAME IN FULL:
NAMES OF YOUR SICKNESS:

YOUR PHONE NUMBER:
HOME TOWN/COUNTRY:
PICTURE OF YOURS:

AGE OF YOURS:
          Immediately this details is ready I will start the spell and you heart desire will be granted by my gods. My gods always speaks for me and I am confident about my work. You are also advice not to contact any other spell caster because two spell caster can not work on a spell so immediately this details is provided by you i will start with the consultation  of the spell in the next days you will see the result and you will be okay and all your heart desire will be granted by my gods so i need your urgent response to carry out the casting of the spell.

           
               I will be glad to hear from you because I find you problem so easy for me to handle.  I wait your urgent response.
Regards
Dr Ogangan
--


Attachments: Ogangan Temple.jpg
DrOgangan.jpg


Whelp.  Let's see what I've gotten myself into.

 

September 25, 2012
Subject: Re: GREAT OGANGAN SPIRITUAL TEMPLE

From: Will Smith

To: Dr. Ogangan

 Oh great and powerful wizard,

Thank you for your help and enlightenment.  You are a gracious, kind soul.  It is clear that you are a truly powerful shaman to perform such a service over the internet.  I am in your debt.  Here is my information:

Name: William Carlton Smith
Names of my Sickness: Doctors have called it "Explosive Hemorroidal Expansion" or EHE for short.  It is an embarrassing, life-threatening illness with no known cure.
Phone: 91-102-4357
Home town/Country: Bel-Air, USA
Picture: Please see the attached picture of me shootin some B-Ball
Age of mine: 20

It is good to know that this problem will be easy for you to handle with your spells.  You mentioned that I should not contact other spell casters.  However, for about a week I have been in contact with another spell caster.  He has also said that he can cure my sickness.  What do you think I should do?  It seems I am inundated with spell casters.

I just want to be healthy again.  How should I proceed?

Your faithful servant,
Will Smith


Attachments: Will_Smith_Bel-Air_Shootin_Some_BBall.jpg
 


Maybe he's not familiar with my disease.




November 14, 2012
Subject: Online Appointment

From: Naomi Meza

To: Christopher

Dear Christopher,
Thank you for submitting a recent request for information for a work from home position through our website. We appreciate your interest for more details and think you may possibly be a match for our company which is a U.S. based award-winning company. We are expanding and are looking for motivated, personable and reliable performers with moderate computer skills.
We are currently scheduling first step interviews with potential candidates to fill our full-time and part-time positions. Our session will be conducted in an online office by appointment only. You will need a computer, high speed Internet, and your phone.
We have openings this week for our online briefings as listed below:

Thursday, November 15th - 7:00 PM/CT
Friday, November 16th - 2:00 PM/CT, 6:00 PM/CT
Monday, November 19th - 11:00 AM/CT, 6:00 PM/CT

There will be more additional times next week. Please reply to this email with a request to be considered for future dates and times should you need them.

We look forward to hearing back from you right away to confirm your appointment. Once a date is selected, you will receive an email confirmation with Instructions for entering our Offices. I am looking forward to meeting with you.

Sincerely,

Naomi Meza, HR

Career Development Group


November 14, 2012
Subject: Online Appointment

From: Christopher

To: Naomi Meza

Question: does the job in question require small firearms training?


November 14, 2012
Subject: Online Appointment

From: Naomi Meza

To: Christopher

No, not even close.


November 14, 2012
Subject: Online Appointment

From: Christopher

To: Naomi Meza

That's fine.  I just wanted to see what I'd be getting myself into.  Would I be working with children or animals?  Because I am allergic to cat fur.  Well, long cat fur; cats with short hair I am ok around.




I don't think I'm getting the job...




November 8, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Mike

To: --

Message.jpg

A jpeg image of a standard scam offer: someone died and I get all the money blah blah blah.



November 8, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Ned Stark

To: MikeBongani

Hello Michael,
I am glad to know that my last name matches your late client.  I can assure you that I am in fact the person that you are looking for.  Please tell me what my options are here.

-Ned


November 12, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: MikeBongani

To: Ned Stark

Good Day,
Firstly I want to thank you very much for your response to my e-mail to you, I want to use this opportunity reassure you that this transaction that we are about to go into is 100% legitimate and doesn't breach any international or locally banking laws. So there is nothing for you to worry about.

I didn’t give you more details when I contacted you initially because I want to be sure that you are willing to work with us, I am Head/manager of Internal auditing Department of my bank (Nedbank Group Of South Africa), we discovered an abandoned contract sum of money $17.5 million (Seventeen Million five hundred Thousand dollar) belonging to one of our Foreign Customer, a businessman/Contractor, who was involved in terrible accident along with his family. 

I reached you because, I know it is circumstantially possible for you to be related to the deceased and we are basing our game plan on the possibility that you are remotely related to the deceased, irrespective of whether that is the case or not.

Our importance/role in the proposed deal is the fact that we are well positioned and officially capable of leveraging a successful claim of the available cash, by presenting you as a beneficiary, strictly based on the same surname you share with the deceased, we are equally capable of setting up the internal paper work, as a basis to officially make it possible for you to be recognized as the bona-fide next of kin and beneficiary to the available cash, which of course, will be eventually split between us 60 for me and my colleague, while 40 for you .

However, if you are interested in this transaction and willing to allow us to front you as beneficiary, first before we could do anything we are to have a common understanding among ourselves because The success of the claim will depend on how confidentially you handle the proposed deal, and how responsive you are in terms of granting us your consent and co-operation in every necessary manner, in order to make the proposed deal a success. In turn, we promise to make the deal a resounding success with no backlash for you or for us.

Consequently as a result of the urgency and time being of the essence in this transaction, I will appreciate you forward to me the following information for confirmations before we proceed or if possible you call me immediately on my contact number
-- to enable me brief you about this transaction.

1 Your direct confidential (Cell Number) telephone(s)
2 Sex, 3 Your full names
4 Your Age, 5 Your Country of Resident and Address
6 Occupation/profession

I will want to give you the assurance that this project is scheduled to be completed within 10 to 14 working days if all instructions are followed up religiously. But you have to assure and guarantee me that you are going to be trustworthy and honesty as soon as the funds arrives in your account because human behaviors funny at times especially when it comes to money issue.

I wait to hear from you soonest.

Mr. M. Bongani


November 12, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Ned Stark

To: MikeBongani

Hello Mr. M. Bongani,

I'm afraid that I am traveling to Antarctica for business, and am therefore reading your email at the airport, waiting for my private jet to arrive.
The formatting is all messy and I can't read the message.
Could you please send it again, except this time hit [enter] every 15 words?
I very much appreciate this.
I will be able to answer all of your questions once I can read everything.

Regards,
Ned Stark


November 12, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: MikeBongani

To: Ned Stark

Here is it, i send it as attachment

Attachment: hereitis.pdf


November 12, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Ned Stark

To: MikeBongani

Hello Mr. M. Bongani,

Unfortunately my phone does not allow me to open up email attachments.
The only thing I could read in the body of your email was "Here it is, i send it as attachment."

I was able to read your first email, it is just that I will just need you to re-send it hitting [enter] every 15 words.
That way I can read it on my phone.
Thank you.

Regards,
Ned Stark


November 13, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: MikeBongani

To: Ned Stark

Hope you can read it now
Good Day,
Firstly I want to thank you very much for your response to my e-mail to you,

 I want to use this opportunity reassure you that this transaction that we are about to go into
 is 100% legitimate and doesn't breach any international or locally banking laws. 

So there is nothing for you to worry about.

I didn’t give you more details when I contacted you initially because I want to be sure that you are willing to work with us, 
I am Head/manager of Internal auditing Department of my bank (Nedbank Group Of South Africa), 

we discovered an abandoned contract sum of money $17.5 million (Seventeen Million five hundred Thousand dollar)
 belonging to one of our Foreign Customer, a businessman/Contractor, who was involved in terrible accident along with his family. 

I reached you because, I know it is circumstantially possible for you to be related to

 the deceased and we are basing our game plan on the possibility that you are remotely related to the deceased, irrespective of whether that is the case or not.
Our importance/role in the proposed deal is the fact that we are well positioned and officially capable of 

leveraging a successful claim of the available cash, by presenting you as a beneficiary, strictly based on the
 same surname you share with the deceased, we are equally capable of setting up the internal paper work, 
as a basis to officially make it possible for you to be recognized as the bona-fide next of kin and beneficiary to the available cash, which of course,
 will be eventually split between us 60 for me and my colleague, while 40 for you .
However, if you are interested in this transaction and willing to allow us to front you as beneficiary, first before we could do anything
 we are to have a common understanding among ourselves because The success of the claim will depend on how confidentially you
 handle the proposed deal, and how responsive you are in terms of granting 
us your consent and co-operation in every necessary manner, in order to make the 
proposed deal a success. In turn, we promise to make the deal a resounding success with no backlash for you or for us.

Consequently as a result of the urgency and time being of the essence in this transaction, 
I will appreciate you forward to me the following information for confirmations before we proceed 
or if possible you call me immediately on my contact number
-- to enable me brief you about this transaction.

1 Your direct confidential (Cell Number) telephone(s)
2 Sex, 3 Your full names
4 Your Age, 5 Your Country of Resident and Address
6 Occupation/profession
I will want to give you the assurance that this project is scheduled to be completed 
within 10 to 14 working days if all instructions are followed up religiously. 
But you have to assure and guarantee me that you are going to be trustworthy and honesty as soon as the funds arrives in your account
 because human behaviors funny at times especially when it comes to money issue.
I wait to hear from you soonest.
Mr. M. Bongani


November 13, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Ned Stark

To: MikeBongani

Hello Mr. Mike Bongani,

That was a test, and you passed with flying colors.  Mike, can I call you Mike?  Mike, you've got gumption, and I like that.  You're a straight shooter.  You can go straight to the top.  What I'm trying to say is I want you to work for me.

I run a large, multinational corporation, mostly investing in new technology.  And there's a job that I think you'd be perfect for.  It doesn't require any special skills, and in fact, you can do it remotely.  You wouldn't even have to change locations (we would pay for you to come to the U.S. if you prefer, but you don't have to).  I know you are qualified because you have people skills.  You know how to talk to people and assert dominance over them, and that's really the core of what we do here.  If you're interested, I can provide more information on what your role would be.

The salary is $413,500 annually, but that is negotiable.  One time holiday bonus, vacations days, medical plan.  Get back to me if you're interested Mike, because I need you on the team.

-Ned Stark
CEO Stark Industries


November 15, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Ned Stark

To: MikeBongani

Mike, I only offer this great opportunity once.  Don't let this pass you by.


November 15, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: MikeBongani

To: Ned Stark

Give me your website



November 15, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Ned Stark

To: MikeBongani

Hi Mike,

I'm glad to see that you are interested.  A little gruff, but I like that.  It shows you have balls.  I like balls.

Here's our website.  Check out what you see and respond back to my personal email (I'm still on business and can't get any phone calls in Antarctica for the time being).

http://www.starkindustries.com/

-Ned Stark
CEO Stark Industries

Good thing this company exists and it's not a bunch of Ironman stuff


November 15, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: MikeBongani

To: Ned Stark

So what do you want from me?

how do you want me to work for u?



November 15, 2012
Subject: THANK YOu

From: Ned Stark

To: MikeBongani

Well Mike, I'm glad you asked.  I knew you had balls.

Basically what you'd be doing is finding new customers and getting in touch with our current customers.  You'd handle contact information, banking information, and respond to questions (nothing technical).  It's the kind of job that needs a lot of customer interaction, and you seem like the right kind of guy for that.

The first thing I'll need is just some basic contact info (name, address, etc.) and your current resume.  Then I'll look it over just to check the boxes and ask a few questions here and there and then I'll hand it off to HR.  You should expect a job offer within a week.  Nothing too taxing, since I already know you're the guy I want.

So just email me your contact info and your resume and we can go from there. 

Talk to you real soon, Mike.

-Ned Stark

Hiking the Carters: A Magical Foray into "Almost Winter"

I am approaching the finish line for hiking the 48 4000-footers of the White Mountains, and this past weekend I hiked the Carters, which put me at number 47.  Just one more to go, and then New Hampshire is MINE.

The Carters were a really fun hike.  A bit on the longer side (about 15 miles), but nothing difficult enough to make me curse the gods.  And there was surprisingly no snow and minimal ice - it was barely winter up there.  Just a pleasant stroll up a mountain, along a ridge line (got some great views), and back down a different trail. 
We've got the Presidential Ridge... somewhere back there

I traveled with Sterling and Mike, who are experienced hikers, so our pace was pretty impressive.  Also, we had some great conversations along the way, including re-hashing our previous idea of creating an Appalachian Trail relay that we had come up with while hiking Owl's Head.

Due to the fact that we started hiking pretty late (10am - Yikes), we didn't get down to the end of the trail until about an hour after sunset, so we had to whip out our headlamps and try to avoid the icy patches.  The other thing was that when we finished hiking, we were still about 2 miles from where we parked the car, but luckily some hitchhiking assuaged that issue.

If I had to sum up the Carters hike: it was a pleasant hike with some good views and my knees were in no way exploding by the end.
Carter Dome Summit.  Or the picture from a 90's boyband.  Your call.